Lessons of My Path

Late night ponderings over my time in Far North Queensland. There is something magic up here, I think it’s the growth that has evolve for me. I came back to rest but didn’t really do that, you see I’ve always pushed myself hard, and I realize I’ve been remembering something my father always said to me “there are no slackers in the Clark family”. Its funny how things stick in your mind, and that you can look back, and you’ve worked hard. But dam I have had fun in the process. My life hasn’t gone in the straightest of paths, mine twists and turns. I’ve learnt some lessons hard, and some lessons are etch in my heart never forgotten. Some lessons came close to breaking me and me surrending to be gone. I call those the fucked up years. For those were the years you had to look at the darkness within , to find a little light of hope. No this wee lass is not good at slowing down, so good old FNQ put out its welcome mat. So since I wasn’t listening to my inner self, came a fall at work and good old ribs copping it, and from this came a series of events-hospital, blood pressure up, along came a spider who decided to bite ya, doctors, blood pressure monitoring, full blood tests, BP meds, side effects from med, cut meds in half, find out iron levels are rock bottom, heart beating its own drum and running away with itself, creativity zero. Now I think that was the brick to the head moment-I did say I was a slow learner. To be brought up short that I had to lighten my load, look after myself and re-align myself with my path. When we are wading through old layers, ancestral baggage, our own baggage, we lose sight of the path, forgetting our dreams. When I got to FNQ, I put a hold on part of my dream, then the Universe, Mother and the Animals put their big boots on and caned my ass. To get my body working right, work in progress, heart is learning to behave, not keen on the 1000 volts again-must laugh even when life zaps us, creativity is back, my focus is back and the track to my dream is back on. I see the vision, I’ve held in my mind, clearly. Even looking at people who have crossed my path, been part of my journey, some lacked Mana, and those are my biggest teachers right now, as I release much around this, my anger is only in the moment, but I allow things to niggle- but my heart has been the biggest teacher in this with them, to hold calmness, sit in peace, release, and hold love. I also know im a very cut and dry person- lose my trust, never is regained. It doesn’t have to be. We spend life times worrying about what others will think, trying to please, while we forget about self. We also forget those people who gossip, twist stories and misguide the truth, we have to hold love for them, as in, if this is how they operate, what turmoil is going on within themselves. We forget we haven’t walked in there shoes, to be where they are today. To sit and be. To hold self in love, to care for self and to honour self, its all about being true to self. Because when we allow people get under our skin, that is our ego coming to play. The true addressing of ego, as a beautiful brother reminded me the other day. Love it when talking with beautiful brothers, they have a pearl of wisdom, that makes you smile and blessed to have them. I’m a strong Woman, gypsy in my heart, not afraid to wander, but now I know where I wish my wandering to take me, in pursuit of my dream and my path. Most of all my passion………passion keeps us ticking, and dancing, let alone the laughter. Passion creates doorways, new paths, new people to cross our path, new animal teachers, new teachers………all we have to do is let go and trust. Universe I’m ready for the next step, lets boogie Arohanui