Fairy Tale or Truth


Lately and today, have been pondering-“What is the right partner for us?”. I pose I’m looking at what I value there, shit I have a whole list written in my manifestation book of what I value. I have been questioning myself on all these wants, and wonder at times do we set the the ball park figure to high and make it untainable. We want our men to rise beside us, in doing this do we look at the ones who don’t fit the bill and say, nah not you. Because he smokes or drinks or a rough diamond or hasn’t awaken fully or is attempting to awaken but it’s not a overnight thing. Spirituality and society has in many ways confused the issue, of what the level of the bar should be. Instead of coming back to heart, and feeling deep within for what’s truely right for self. Spirituality people want you to fit a certain mould, so does society. I’m tied of all these moulds, and those who know me well, will know I dance to my own tune. How do we fit ourselves if we are always trying to fit into all these different moulds. Recently I’ve had the pleasure of spending time with a diamond in the rough, who doesn’t fit my whole list in my manifestation book. And last night we spent a good part of the evening star/moon gazing with a Tawny sitting with us, I felt like we had a guardian sitting with us. We talked and listened to each other. Yet this morning I drove back up, questioning my spending time with someone, who doesn’t tick all my boxes. I expressed this to a beautiful friend, who came back with these words “Well.. Enjoy it for what it is my friend xx❤” Such true words. I have no expectations with this friend, just the enjoyment of his company. The future isn’t written. We get lost in the future when it hasn’t even happened. This has been my biggest realisation of late-that my winter solstice release was release all- the house I live in, my job, my life. Because I don’t know what the future is bringing me. Don’t get me wrong I will work hard at all in my life, but my choice is to live in the now. With no expectations. Life can change at any moment, so living in the now is vital. The past created who we are, we can use the past to make us stronger, see our lessons , be honest with ourselves on our parts in it. There is a difference of living in past or talking about past as aspect of you, the later doesn’t mean your living in past, just means you understand your lessons. And new pathways can open before you. So much has happened for me, since I came to the east coast. Meeting of the right people, doors have open and at times I’m blown away by what comes to me or presented. The new friends who have come my way. The presents that turn up in the post that I’m not expecting, the private messages to say thank you for my ramblings, for being there for a friend when he is down a dark rabbit hole. So I’m applying this tactic to the men who wander in my life. And the words of a bestie, to just enjoy it for what it is- to be held so gently, to be kissed and to be respected as a crazy woman. For all my ponderings , I am truely grateful Arohanui  


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